Take My Hand and Hold It
by TalkingToTulips
Summary: Jesse St James is walking down the street, and finds out that the mind is a delicate thing and can be as cold as the pavement his love lies on.


**Name**: Take My Hand And Hold It  
**Type**: AU  
**Pairing**: St Berry  
**Summary**: Jesse St James is walking down the street, and finds out that the mind is a delicate thing and can be as cold as the pavement his love lies on.

* * *

Jesse ran his head through his hair as he walked out the apartment block he was renting with a friend from the theatre company, the 7am sunrise greeting the streets of New York as the city started up for the day. It had been a year, 4 months, 6 days and 21 hours since he'd last seen Rachel Berry. It had been a year, 4 months and 5 days since he'd handed in his resignation as Coach of Vocal Adrenaline and headed to New York to pursue his dreams, that had been reignited the previous day by Rachel Berry. Since then, he had joined an off broadway theatre company and they were now rehearsing for their production of We Will Rock You, which was great for Jesse, being emmersed in so much Queen, Freddie Mercury and good music.

Today, Jesse had decided to get up early and go for a walk to get some breakfast, listen to some music and enjoy the city that he called home. He wandered aimlessly around the streets, his iPod pumping music into his ears as the sun continued to slowly rise. Jesse's thoughts were not on Rachel Berry, no where near the girl. They were wondering whether the shirt the man passing him was forest or moss green. Whether he should get a Starbucks. When he should next call his family and let them know he hadn't been murdered. Not on Rachel Berry.

Jesse turned onto a street and was awestruck by a group of people seeming to surround something, encircle and ensnare it like a protective gate. He started towards the group, pulling the iPod headphones from his ears and stuffing them into his bag as he got closer. Due to how far off the beaten track the street was and the time, no cars were passing through only to meet the group of people, seemingly normal, business men and women, a girl with a backpack, about twenty in total, all whispering.

"Does anyone know her?"

"We should call the police."

"Call the mental hospital."

"Poor lamb."

"Horrible place she must be in, in the mind." An elderly woman with kind eyes said regrettably as Jesse arrived on the cusp of the group, craning to see what, or who, they were all talking about so quietly and worriedly. After excusing himself as he pushed through the crowds, he found his answer to the question. His heart wrenching answer.

Rachel Berry lay on the cold pavement, gravel in her hand, in nothing but her pajamas of just a NYADA sweatshirt and some checked pajama pants. She was staring up at the sky like it held all the answers, her eyes soft and understanding. A middle aged woman was trying to gain her attention by kneeling beside her and shaking her shoulder, asking if she was okay. "Let me through, I know her!" Jesse told the people desperately, so they parted and he knelt next to the girl as she focused on the rising sun. "Why is she like this?"

"I don't know. My three year old saw her walking out the apartment block and just lie down. She's been like this for about a half an hour now, won't speak, move." The middle aged woman explained, also in her pajamas as Jesse ran his fingers gently through Rachel's hair. No reaction. The crowd watched on, Jesse noticed that most of them were in some sort of nightwear, having come to see what the commotion was about.

"Poor sweetheart," the elderly woman muttered "She lay on this road here with intentions of dying, I'll tell you that now. A dark place is where her mind be." She continued, waving a hand at Rachel as Jesse continued to to stroke her hair soothingly. Rachel's face remained stoic and plain, staring up at the sky.

"I say we call the police." A business woman interjected, there were some murmurs of agreement.

"No. We can handle this without involving them. And she hasn't exactly committed a crime." The middle aged woman retorted. Jesse shushed them all and played with her hair gently.

"Rachel, baby." He started in a whisper. "You don't need to do this. I won't let you do this. Please just look at me, Rachel. Do something that isn't staring up like its the last thing you'll ever see. It won't be. You're going to see many wonderful things before you die, including hundreds more sunrises, thousands of sunsets, I promise. Just look at me." He told her in a murmur. Still no reaction from the woman in his arms. "Fine then." Jesse told her. And with that, Jesse lay down next to her on the pavement, took her hand and watched her as she stared. The crowd looked baffled, the elderly woman smiled. "Go back to your days. She won't be alone now." He told them all in a slightly louder voice than normal. He expected them to disperse or call the police, or just stare at him like he was mad. Expected them to just carry on with their days like they hadn't encountered a mad woman who laid down in the cold, broken road and the man who joined her.

Instead, he caught in the corner of his eye, a three year old, presumably the one who had seen Rachel in the first place. She was small, black hair, blue eyes, clutching a teddy as she waddled over to the two of them and lay down between them with a grin. "Amy, what are you doing?" Her mother asked in shock, stammering a little.

"Don't want her to be alone, Momma." The girl replied as she watched Rachel, putting her teddy on Rachel's stomach to comfort her. There were some awwing noises and some of agreement. Jesse was so fixated on the child's kindness that he nearly missed the old woman lying down on Rachel's other side, to be joined by a few others. Most of the group stayed standing and staring in awe at the display in human lay there for a while, the whole time Jesse stared at Rachel's unchanging face as the sun began to rise further and the shadows began to shrink from her features. He would wait until she was ready, he told himself, she was worth it. He played with her hair and told her in gentle whispers about his work, sang a few lyrics to her and hummed a little. Whatever he thought could comfort her in her hour of need.

"Ever noticed how blue the sky is?" was the reward he received after what seemed like an eternity of waiting. Rachel's head turned to face his ad she smiled softly, tears leaking down her face and onto the cold floor. Jesse just smiled back and played with her hair, too tired to move just yet.


End file.
